Dude, I Totally Miss You
by MrsW0nka
Summary: Sam gets blackmailed into selling himself, and is addicted to demon blood. Dean notices that Sam isn't himself. Dean has to make everything ok. There is no Ruby, Sam drinks random demons! Dean/Sam Wincest Rape Addiction Agnst
1. Chapter 1

**Sadly I don't own supernatural, or any characters. **

Chapter one

Sam lay awake looking around the dark room. He could see the dirty walls and cracked ceiling every time a car drove past and their lights shone through the thin curtains. Sam turned to see his brother fast asleep looking peaceful, the only time he didn't looked burdened from what life has done to him.

And it was Sam's fault. Sam's fault Dean had to go to hell. He didn't get stabbed on purpose but if it wasn't for that Dean would still be, well, Dean.

Sam felt that itching inside him for something. Something he hasn't been able to get out of his mind since he heard another hunter talking about it.

He threw his long legs over the edge of the bed and onto the cold floor; he stepped into his boots and closed the door quietly. He didn't bother with a coat even though it was cold out; he thought the cold air would do him good. He tried to clear his mind as he walked through the empty streets, the cold air stinging his cheeks.

He turned a corner and saw two figures in a dark shadow walking towards him. Sam stretched out his spine to his full height as the figures neared him; he looked down to them who both looked back with a smirk. As they blinked at Sam their eyes turned jet black but Sam was ready, he already had a knife out of his belt and at one of their throats. The demons weren't ready for him being a hunter and the demon that Sam didn't have pinned to a wall had already fled out of the body it was using, leaving it lifeless on the floor.

Sam dipped his hand into a small salt bag he had in his pocket and smothered the demons mouth with it, not allowing the demon to escape out of its body. With the knife he pushed it across the skin of the demons neck, watching the blood drip down its skin. The demon watched Sam as he leant in and sucked at the drips of blood, taking in the taste. Sam withdrew with blood smeared around his mouth not unlike the very things he has hunted. He took some deep breaths as he took in the buzzing adrenaline from the blood and he took his hand away from the demon that just stood there staring at him. Before the demon knew it Sam had started reciting a passage to send it back to hell.

Sam stood in the alley clenching his fists at this feeling. He wanted more.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two

Sam wiped his mouth roughly, smearing the blood down his sleeve. This feeling, he feels stronger than ever. Raindrops started falling to the ground and he turned to see someone running towards him. It was a man with a knife and a gun in his hands; he stopped when he reached Sam.

"You're good." The man said looking at Sam and then to the bodies. Sam just stared at him not sure what to think.

"Don't worry, I'm a hunter," the man said putting away his weapons and showing Sam an anti-possession amulet and Sam nodded at him but didn't want to introduce himself.

"You actually remembered the passage to send those bastards back to hell. I still have my print out." The man joked and Sam just nodded again. The man started examining Sam, the blood on his sleeve but the fact that Sam was completely uninjured. And then to the blood smear across his face.

"Are you..." the man asked, his expression changing to hatred. Sam wiped his face again but the man had already sussed it out. He was pointing his gun at Sam straight in the face.

"You're as bad as them." The man growled and Sam put his hands up in surrender.

"Disgusting son of a bitch." He spat at Sam, Sam just stood silently looking down at him.

"Just walk away." Sam said in a low voice and a menacing expression.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't hunt you down like I do vampires?" Sam took his hands down and clenched them into fists again; the man saw and laughed at Sam for this. The man hit Sam around the head with the handle of his gun, knocking Sam down to his knees. The pain was blinding but Sam stared at the hunter. The man cocked the gun and aimed it at Sam's forehead; Sam didn't close his eyes he still stared intently, not showing his fear.

"I'll tell you what..." The man started and he took his gun away from Sam. "If you do something for me, I won't kill you or tell every other hunter out there what you do." The man cackled with an evil smirk staring at his gun and then the Sam again. "That includes your brother." Sam got up from his knees and stood close to the man.

"What do you want me to do?" Sam said with a deep voice. The man stood holding his chin in the most obvious way to show that he was thinking and then clapped his hands together.

"I've got it." The man said now rubbing his hands together like a greedy rich man. "A pretty boy like you could do well in this line of work." Sam just stared at him in anger, wondering where he was going with his thought.

"You sell yourself and pay me every dollar you earn." The man said flatly like he has made this deal before. "But the most popular line of work these days is in the gay market." The man said shaking his head in disgust.

"I think you'd do well there. And if you don't, well, I'll find you. So do we have a deal?" He said lifting his gun back up to Sam's chest. With a deep breath Sam nodded and the man laughed loudly.

"I'll be rich!" He said as he walked away still laughing to himself. Sam stood staring after him, all the amazing feelings from the demon blood that were rushing through him were all gone by now.

His feet started walking back towards the motel; he had gotten into enough trouble for one night. He got to the door and opened it quietly and slumped into his lumpy bed.

_Am I really going to sell my body and give this psycho the money? Dean can't find out what I've done, he'll want to hunt me. Dean can never know. _


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter three

Sam couldn't sleep as usual so he went to the bathroom for a shower. He caught a glimpse himself in the grubby mirror and he couldn't quite believe what he was seeing. A gaunt face he hardly recognised, dark eyes with big tired rings around them, his cheeks were thinning and there was blood smeared around his chin.

What was he turning into?

After a long shower Sam got dressed and thought some coffee would make him look a little less tired. He crept out past Dean and out the door. As he walked all he could think of was the hunter that found him last night, and what he said. He thought he saw the man's face in every window that he passed watching him and waiting for him to do what he was told. Sam shook it off as he went into a coffee shop.

He took two and started drinking one as he left but he walked straight into somebody just around the corner.

"Sorry." Sam mumbled not looking up from his coffee but as he tried to walk away a hand stopped him, he looked up.

"Hello, Sammy." The hunter said with a sickening smile. "Thanks for the coffee." The hunter took a coffee from Sam. "This," the man said before taking a sip, "is your first client. I thought I would deliver him to you personally as it is your first time." Sam looked to the man standing behind the hunter, he was taller than the hunter but not as tall as Sam, he was balding and had that biker look about him, as well as the beard.

"This way." The biker man beckoned towards a motel sign and Sam couldn't believe that he was following the guy. The hunter leant against the wall with the coffee watching them enter the motel.

Sam followed the man as he walked up to a door, he didn't notice the number as he got pushed through the doorway. He stumbled over his feet and dropped the coffee, making the man laugh darkly.

"Pick it up." The man said. Sam stood for a second listening to the man's wheezy breathing, then he bent forward and retrieved the now empty cup. He could feel the man's eyes on his every movement.

"Sweet ass." The man whispered and he took off his leather jacket, throwing it aside and stepping towards Sam.

Before he knew it Sam was being pushed down face first onto a dusty bed. The man's wheezing got louder as he restrained Sam with a knee on his back as he unzipped his jeans. Sam felt his jeans get pulled down slightly, Sam tried to resist but he was stuck face down in the sheets.

He felt the man at his rear, touching his skin lightly but then he felt a slap. The man took one hand to Sam's hair and pulled it tightly, making sure Sam wouldn't move or try to struggle. Then Sam felt a sharp pain as the man had pushed his hard erection into Sam's entrance. Sam gasped and clenched at the sheets trying not to move as the man would pull his hair even harder.

Sam felt the man pull out and he felt himself throbbing from the pain, but then the man pushed himself back in harder than before.

"Fuck yeah..." The man breathed as he pushed in and out of Sam. Sam shut his eyes tight and tried not to listen as the man's breathing told him that he was getting close. The man withdrew a little later and pushed Sam's face into the sheets even harder as he got up then zipped himself up.

"See you next time." The man heaved through heavy breaths then he threw some notes on the bed next to Sam and left.

Sam lay still not wanting to move from the pain, and moving would mean accepting what has happened. He could feel the man's warm leftovers on him and really wanted to shower it off. He slowly pushed himself off of the bed and had a quick wash; he didn't want to be in that room any longer than he needed to be. As he was leaving he remembered the money on the bed and went to pick it up.

Twenty dollars. Was that it? Surely he was worth more than that.

Sam went to leave the motel; he pushed his hair down and took a deep breath ready to act normal. But before he could he saw that the hunter was waiting for his money. Sam threw the notes at him and they landed on the floor then walked off as fast as his long legs would carry him. He didn't want to see that hunters face ever again. But deep down he knew he would be seeing a lot of him.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter four

Sam got back to the motel and stood at the door, not wanting to face Dean – not wanting to face anybody. He took a deep breath then went in the dark room.

"Where'd you go?" Dean asked and Sam jumped.

"Err, coffee..." Sam said but realised he didn't have the coffee anymore.

"Where is it then?" Dean asked looking at Sam's empty hands.

"Drank it..." Sam said avoiding eye contact with Dean and heading for the bathroom.

"Thanks for getting me some, man." Dean said watching Sam with a confused look on his face. Sam just slammed the door and locked himself into the bathroom. This was harder than he'd imagined. Dean notices all of Sam's change in emotions.

Sam stood with his back against the door then there was a bang on it.

"Sam, are you ok?" Dean's voice came through.

"Yeah, just need a shower." Sam said and Dean left him alone. Sam decided to have another shower.

Sam stood under the water and turned it up as high as it would go. After a moment the hot water finally got hot and it began to burn his skin, Sam stood under it with his eyes closed; washing away everything that had happened.

"Sam, come on! You've bee half an hour!" Dean banged on the door again snapping Sam out of his daze. He stepped out of the shower and got dressed.

Dean was waiting outside the door when Sam went out, still eyeing him up suspiciously.

"Dude, what's up?" Dean said as Sam went to look out of the window.

"Nothing," Sam said knowing Dean won't stop asking after his one word answer. Dean walked over to Sam and looked out of the window, wondering what Sam was looking at. Dean then stood staring up at Sam who was still really trying to avoid Dean's eye line.

"Sam?" Dean said pulling on Sam's shoulder so they faced each other. Sam looked down at Dean still not talking and then he looked at his feet.

"What's happened?" Dean asked still holding Sam's shoulder.

"Nothing. I told you." Sam said to his feet.

"No, Sam I know you, and something's up." Sam shuffled on his feet uncomfortably thinking of an excuse.

"Hunting's just getting to me..." Sam said rather unconvincingly.

"Sammy... you know we can't let it build up on us." Dean said looking up at Sam. "I know how hard it can be."

You have no idea... Sam thought and at this thought he couldn't stop his eyes welling up with tears. Sam turned away from Dean and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand but before he knew it Dean was pulling him around and staring him in the face.

Dean pulled Sam down into a hug and Sam embraced it, he needed it. Sam tried to pull away because he knew he would start crying any minute but Dean wouldn't let him. But then Dean started kissing Sam's ear and Sam pulled away looking down at Dean confused.

Dean didn't say a word he just leant forwards, and upwards, to Sam's lips and kissed him gently. Sam closed his eyes and pulled Dean in closer for more. The brothers were locked in a passionate kiss, Dean's hands going through Sam's hair whilst Sam was holding Dean tightly around his waist.

Suddenly Sam pushed Dean away, he couldn't help but thinking of that morning; him getting raped by the biker guy - his "client". Dean's hands were soft and loving but Sam couldn't help but remember his experience.

Dean looked up at Sam, terror in his eyes, showing the realisation that had just flowed over him about what had just happened. Sam wanted to reach out to his brother and kiss him, tell him how much he meant to him but he couldn't. Dean stared waiting for an explanation but as it didn't come Dean stormed out of the motel. Sam stood staring at the door where Dean had slammed it shut and he collapsed on the bed behind him with his head in his hands.


End file.
